Beta Day

I called my nurse yesterday to tell her I was getting very negative pregnancy tests. She sounds pretty upset/disappointed. I asked if I could possible come in Friday for a beta so I didn’t have to go through the weekend doing shots uncessarily. She surprised me and said to just come in now. Unfortunately, I missed the courier so I had to wait until today for the results.

Officially not pregnant. 

Oh and my TSH was 0.37, so lower than it should be. I wonder if it can be too low to get pregnant. I haven’t had any heart palipations so I honestly didn’t know it was that low. I have an appointment with my Endo on Monday so I am sure we will back down to 75 mcg.

I also have our WTF appointment with Dr. L on Monday. I have a list of things I want to discuss with him about where we go from here.

Everything from doing another biopsy, lap, RPL panel, ERA (endometrial receptivity array), additional supplements (including HGH, ubiquinol, and DHEA), PGD, and last but not least donor embryos. I’ve also reached out to a friend who started the adoption process to get more information on that. 

I don’t feel like our journey has ended. It has taken unexpected twists and turns and has taken longer this time around, but I’m not ready to give up yet. We have options. It’s time to begin exploring them with more of an open mind and open heart. 

Plan E

I’ve been thinking about where we’ve been and where we are going lately. I guess that happens when you don’t have anything but time.

M and I started trying for a family about 11 months ago. It’s crazy how fast the year as gone by and how naive hopeful we were.

Plan A was to chart and within a few months we would end up getting pregnant on our own. That dream was crushed around month six of trying. So we moved on to Plan B- IUI. We knew our odds sucked, but we have IVF in our back pocket, so not all hope was lost when that was a BFN.

Plan C- IVF with ICSI.  We didn’t have a plan after this, after all we had a 60% chance of success. Well, since we fell on the unlucky 40% side, we needed a new plan. M and I talked about what we wanted to do and how many times we would continue to try before we moved on.  I am still waiting to get all of my test results back, but one thing we are doing differently this cycle is throwing in assisted hatching.  I’ve also read studies that show endometrial scratching may improve implantation rates, so I will ask Dr. L about this in a few weeks.  So that’s our plan D. Try two more fresh cycles.  We may consider lumping FET into this, but probably will still need a break after the fresh cycles.

I am a planner. I am not trying to be negative, but I need to have some sort of answer to “ok, what’s next?” if IVF doesn’t work.

So Plan E. IF we get to this point, M and I will begin looking into adoption. As M said, we will have a family, one way or another. It’s simple comments like that that make me love him even more.

On a lighter note, I’ve missed charting! I  had a nice temp spike today so I am fairly confident I ovulated yesterday but will confirm in a few days. Bring on the TWW 🙂