Eggs In The PGS Basket

I love my nurse. I really do. I wish she was my Aunt or something. I may adopt her as family when it’s all said and done.
I called her today after we exchanged emails and we talked about the upcoming cycle and dates. I told her we are on the fence about PGS testing and she said “I don’t tell this to all of my patients, but you are a smart cookie. I know you research and are very smart. If I felt strongly about PGS in your situation, I would tell you, but I don’t so you need to do what is best for you and your family. We are here to facilitate what your needs are.” I told her if I win the lottery than things may change. She suggested I email Dr. L to let him know what my thoughts are and to get his thoughts on skipping PGS.
This was my email-
M and I discussed our options and what insurance will cover and at this point, I think we are leaning more towards doing a fresh cycle and transfer.
I understand the benefit of doing PGS, but unfortunately for the same cost as one PGS cycle (fresh cycle with PGS testing then FET) we could essentially do 3 fresh cycles with insurance.
I know that PGS could enable us to transfer an euploid embryo which may result in a viable pregnancy, but I am wondering if we only have let’s say 3 embryos on day 5, does it come down to a numbers game? Granted transferring 2-3 embryos isn’t ideal (and probably gives you and M a heart attack), but given the quality of what we have seen, what are our odds of pregnancy if we transfer 2-3 untested embryos (for 3 cycles) versus transferring one PGS tested embryo (provided we even get one in our first cycle)? Are we at the point that doing PGS is really our best/only option? My fear is literally putting all of our eggs in one basket-that is to say if we do PGS and it doesn’t result in pregnancy, we would not have funds to do another cycle for some time.
I am not sure you are able to answer that without going through another cycle.
Of course if we were to win the lottery, that would be a game changer!
We still have a month to decide, but I wanted to get your thoughts.

_________________________________________________

We will see what he thinks!
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Doctor, Doctor 

A little late but let me fill you in on the RE and Endo appointment from last week. 

First up- the “seriously WTF” appointment with our RE. Prior to meeting, I researched and had an idea of what I wanted to put out on the table. I got the usual talk- we had had luck in the past so we know it’s not all doom and gloom. We have some hurdles but the RE is still optimistic. I want to believe him I really do. I guess I’m just more jaded going into our FOURTH freaking cycle. 

We are talking a break as I mentioned before. Give my body a chance to regulate itself and not to worry about shots and whatnot. Both M and I will take Ubiquinol in hopes of helping with egg and sperm quality. Next month, I will repeat my day 3 blood work for insurance and also do a repeat biopsy to make sure the endometritis is cleared up. If not, I will do another round of doxycycline and will repeat the biopsy in March. Our hope is for me to start BCP in March and only take them for 2 weeks to make sure I’m not I over suppressed. My RE doesn’t think I was last fresh cycle but I don’t know. It took a higher level of meds to get my ovaries to work. My RE kindly pointed out that I’m 3 years older than I was last fresh cycle and we may just have to work a little harder now. Super so I have old eggs now. 

What else…oh right. PGS testing. We discussed it again. I did the math again and after its all said and done, provided we have anything to transfer, it would be roughly $11,800 (without meds) to do a cycle, test and transfer. Conpared to roughly $4000 (without meds) to do a fresh cycle and transfer. 

So basically we could do 3 fresh cycles for the price of one PGS cycle. 

We have time to think it over but financially I’m leaning towards taking our chances and not testing. And being more aggressive and putting 2-3 back. 

Ok enough of the RE visit. I also met with my Endo. I hate the practice. The nurses just annoy me.

I had my vitals taken and then the questions start-

Fatigue? Anxiety? Depression? Trouble sleeping? Constipation?

I answer as nicely as I can. I have a toddler and just had another failed IVF cycle. How am I supposed to tell you if any of my “symptoms” are thyroid related. 

Then the nurse says, “if you don’t mind me asking, how did the last cycle go?” I refrain from saying something inappropriate and just tell her it failed…again. The icing on the cake is when she said “what about exercise?” and “do you drink?” 

I threw my phone at her…in my head. Seriously? Please don’t ever ask something going through IF treatment either of those questions. I don’t know, maybe I was wearing my cranky pants, but until you go through IVF you have no idea of the toll it takes on your body, mind and spirit. 

But to answer her stupid question, yes to both. 

The Endo finally came in and we talked about my TSH and we decided to reduce my meds a little. I’ve also asked her to test my antibody level. They haven’t been tested in 2 years! After some hesitation, she said ok. She also gave me labs to test my TSH, T3 and T4, vitaminD and a1c1.

Luckily I don’t have to deal with the office for another 5 weeks. 

Phew! 

In the meantime I’m continuing to train for the half marathon in March. Yesterday I ran 6.5 and felt pretty good. 

The next few weeks will boring I think. Which isn’t a bad thing I suppose. 

On A Break

My RE and I are on a break. 

After 6 months of trying to make it work, I’ve decided I need some time off. I broke the news to him gently and he understood. 

In the meantime I am going to do all the things I would’ve have been able to do if I actually got pregnant. 

1. Drink wine. Red wine is good for you, right? 

2. Get a much needed massage. Granted you can do that when pregnant after your first trimester but I need one STAT.

3. Eat tuna fish and eggs benedict as often as I want. And have coffee. 

4. Run a half marathon. I haven’t run in an embarrassingly long time but I have no reason not to start running again. This will be my third 1/2 marathon. I totally guilt tripped M running it with me. What can I say misery loves company.

That’s all I can think of for now. I’m open to more suggestions!

During our break, we will try naturally (haha). I am not sure if I will go all out and temp or just use OPKs. 

I will recap the “Seriously, WTF” meeting with our RE another time. It wasn’t super but it wasn’t awful either. Just not very exciting. 

I will also have to fill you in on the Endo appointment soon.

I’m off to put some Deep Blue cream on my very sore legs! 

Beta Day

I called my nurse yesterday to tell her I was getting very negative pregnancy tests. She sounds pretty upset/disappointed. I asked if I could possible come in Friday for a beta so I didn’t have to go through the weekend doing shots uncessarily. She surprised me and said to just come in now. Unfortunately, I missed the courier so I had to wait until today for the results.

Officially not pregnant. 

Oh and my TSH was 0.37, so lower than it should be. I wonder if it can be too low to get pregnant. I haven’t had any heart palipations so I honestly didn’t know it was that low. I have an appointment with my Endo on Monday so I am sure we will back down to 75 mcg.

I also have our WTF appointment with Dr. L on Monday. I have a list of things I want to discuss with him about where we go from here.

Everything from doing another biopsy, lap, RPL panel, ERA (endometrial receptivity array), additional supplements (including HGH, ubiquinol, and DHEA), PGD, and last but not least donor embryos. I’ve also reached out to a friend who started the adoption process to get more information on that. 

I don’t feel like our journey has ended. It has taken unexpected twists and turns and has taken longer this time around, but I’m not ready to give up yet. We have options. It’s time to begin exploring them with more of an open mind and open heart.